An open letter to my friends with Moms in Heaven

     To my friends and my family who have a Mommy in heaven... I think of you. Every mother's day I know the one thing you want more than anything. Your mom. And you are not forgotten. While all of us celebrate with our Moms who are here, I think of you. I don't celebrate a single outing or event with my own mother without the thought that it could be the last. I always hug her. I always tell her I love her. And then your face pops into my head. I hate living in a world where I have multiple friends without a parent, but a mother... that's a special place, a special light and a devastating loss. It forever hurts me and it hurts that I have something others wish they had. In a way, yes. I feel guilty.

     I learned to never take a mother for granted when I was a teenager. You see, there was this girl. She and I would fight over my boyfriend, who didn't quite frankly deserve either of us at the time. We stalked each other, fought, called each other, sent nasty messages. It was well over a year that this went on and it was so awful. And then one day in March, out of the blue, someone texted me to tell me this girl's mother had passed. It was a brain aneurism. Just like that. A mother, a wife, a friend... gone. And I thought, "Wow. All of this time I've been fighting with a girl I hardly even know and was wishing horrible things on her, and this happens." I instantly dropped every negative thought I had about this young girl and promptly texted her best friend to get information on the services. I showed up at her mom's funeral with a bouquet of orange roses (the girl's favorite color). I hugged her and apologized about everything, then looked at her beautiful mother lying there. My heart broke that day, and I feel like I'll always have a crack in it. I was causing grief in someone's life all this time, and probably took so much time away from this girl and her mother... I was so immature. But I promised I would never ever ever treat someone like that again and would NEVER take my mom for granted. But the fact I had to learn a lesson this way is sick and horrible.

     The girl and I got to know each other over the years, and we became friends. We have parents who work together and just hearing her name always makes me smile. Seeing her in person makes my heart explode... I love her so very much because I learned so many life lessons through our relationship. But every mother's day, I think of her Mom. Not just her, but many other friends, like the photo above. The photo above is my client and friend, Meghan, who's mom went to heaven long before she had her daughter Tenley. So we made her apart of this session and will for her son's upcoming session, as well.

     So for those with Earth-Mommies who are in your life, love her no matter what. You have no idea what's coming tomorrow and you won't get today back. And for those with Heaven-Mommies, you are not forgotten and your mom is not forgotten. I see you. And I love you. And I'm wishing your Mom a happy Mother's Day, wherever she is, surely looking down on you :)

Amaya & Family

     Behind this little smile is one big story. This is Amaya. She is a little petite and extra sweet! In May she will be turning two years old, and not long around then.... she will be having major brain surgery.

Amaya, 21 months old

     When Amaya was about two months old, her parents would notice she would stop breathing and have strange movements when she would wake or fall asleep. After some time, they came to find out she was actually having seizures that would cause her to stop breathing.... every parent's worst nightmare. She was ultimately diagnosed with epilepsy. I can't imagine the fright dealing with one of my children not breathing, but for it to be a regular thing with seizures? Her parents are so strong. The only thing they can do while she isn't breathing is to rub her chest to help remind her body to breathe, and keep medicine close at hand that will also help if she continues not to breathe.

     As it turns out, there is a "cure" for these seizures, but it requires a surgery.... in my book or anyone else's, major surgery. Amaya will have to have the entire right side of her brain removed to prohibit these reoccuring seizures. Until talking with this family, I did not even know such a surgery existed and it's something I think about every day.

     Amaya has a big sister named Aubrey, her mommy Tia, and her daddy Matt. Tia and I have known each other since Kindergarten, and while we were never super close friends... she was always very kind in school and we would chat from time to time. About a week ago, Matt contacted me letting me know about the brain surgery and asked how to book a session with me before Amaya has to lose her beautiful head of hair. It was no big decision that we had to get them in as soon as possible before the big surgery, which should be happening within the next few months... right around the time Amaya turns two. Both of her parents are incredibly hard workers. Tia is actually a nurse at A.I. Dupont... a hospital that I absolutely adore that saved my own brother's life when he was a baby.

     I have so much respect for any parent going through the illness, disability or surgery of a child. As you can imagine their medical bills are already extremely major and this surgery is going to be scary enough with their child going through all of this on top of the cost. Amaya's surgery date has yet to be decided, but they should know soon and it will be in Ohio. I have put the link for the Go Fund Me account below, and truly hope you'll consider donating to help this family out. It really would be an incredible blessing to have even half of this surgery taken care of.

Donate and receive updates here: https://www.gofundme.com/amayamccoy

     In addition, our friends over at My Baby's Heartbeat Bear have generously offered to donate a beautiful heartbeat animal to this precious family. A heartbeat animal will be chosen, and within it a small recorder that will hold the sound of Amaya's heartbeat. I have a few, and they are the most treasured items I own. Please learn more about them at http://mybabysheartbeatbear.com/ and give them a like on Facebook at https://www.facebook.com/mybabysheartbeatbear 

Thank you so much for taking the time to read, send healing thoughts and prayers their way, feel free to share, look on my website or fan page for an update (with her parents' permission) after Amaya's surgery and enjoy a few more sneak peeks from their session! Thank you!